The Empathy Box©

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A Simple Way to Spark Stories

The Empathy Box Learning Series explores different components in The Empathy Box© and how they each contribute to creating empathy in group conversations. In this post, we dive into Context Words – our simple mechanism for sparking real, authentic stories. 💖


When we were designing The Empathy Box, one of our guiding principles was for it to be "endlessly replayable". We didn't want this to be a typical game that gets boring after 3 or 4 rounds, shoved into the back of your drawer, never to see the light of day again.

We were bouncing between different mechanisms to spark participant stories – questions? prompts? – before finally deciding on one deceptively simple thing...

... Words.

The Power of Words

We stumbled across the idea of using words from the literary concept of “themes”.

In every story, there’s always a central theme that ties all the different plot-lines together. Just take a look at every book, movie and song ever written. Hercules? Courage. Romeo & Juliet? Love. All Too Well (10 min version)? Heartbreak (and then some).

When it comes to our personal stories, however, the themes aren’t always as evident – especially if it’s still unfolding. But what if we could start thinking about our lives like a story? What would some of the themes be?

A snapshot from our Empathy Box iteration logs. This was from early 2017 – five years ago!

Words are so powerful because they can be uniquely interpreted by each individual. Depending on the context and circumstance, the same word can evoke a whole range of memories, emotions and experiences from different people.

Let's take the word “acceptance” for instance. When you think of that word, does anything in particular come to mind? A memory of being accepted by a group of friends, perhaps? Or the opposite – being rejected from a career opportunity, and losing your sense of security?

Look what happens when you add another word to it, like “family” or “change”. Suddenly, the context has shifted again – and you might find yourself reflecting on what 'acceptance' in your family looks like, or what your relationship to ‘accepting change’ is, instead!

This is the mechanism we decided to build the Empathy Box around. After 2.5 years of testing, going through hundreds of words (our iteration logs are crazy…), we finally settled on the final 20 words that you'll find in The Empathy Box©.

From "family" to "decisions", to "shame" and "transition" – they span the full spectrum of human experience, ensuring everyone will land on a specific topic that resonates with them enough to share. :)

Braille on the special ‘Response Cards’ for the Disability Box collaboration. © Tribeless

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A Story on “Privilege”

In light of the Power of Words, I have a special story to share with you.

Back in 2018, thanks to the generosity of Ashoka and Robert Bosch Stiftung, Tribeless collaborated with (these)abilities, a social enterprise in Singapore to design a "Disability Box".

This custom Box had additional words that were unique to the PWD (People with Disabilities) experience, and even incorporated braille onto the Response Cards!

In one of our play-tests, a participant – a jovial lady with hearing-impairment – chose the word Privilege from the deck. I will admit, the first place my mind jumped to was judgment. I assumed she’d share about how she'd been disadvantaged and ‘lacking privilege’ her whole life — and I know I wasn't alone in thinking that, judging by the look on the other participants' faces.

Imagine everyone’s surprise when she shared about how privileged she felt she was, instead!

“I once went to Hong Kong Disneyland on a child’s price,” she giggled through the interpreter.

“They even threw in FastTrack passes for me and all my deaf friends! In life, sometimes you get more privilege, and sometimes you get less.

It helps us make up for what we don’t have,” she smiled, gesturing towards her ears.

I was absolutely gobsmacked.

With that one story, she had given each and every one of us a new way of understanding the word ‘privilege’.

Her story helped us change the way we saw People with Disabilities, and therefore, the world. All through the act of choosing a word.

A snapshot of the “Disability Box” playtest in Singapore. © Connie Lee, 2018.

If you have an Empathy Box, I encourage you to take it out now. Lay out all the black cards – those are the Context Words – and allow your gaze to roam over them. If a particular word is jumping out at you, don’t hesitate, pick it up and reflect on these questions:

Of all the words in your Empathy Box, why is this one in particular calling to you right now? What do you feel when you see this word? What stories, memories or experiences come to mind?

Comment your answers down below, and let's get a conversation going!